How to Deal When Your Coworkers Ask Awkward Questions

How to Deal When Your Coworkers Ask Awkward Questions If it hasnt happened to you yet, it will. Youll be innocently, comfortably lounging in the break room, kitchen or another shared space. Youll be sitting on some furniture designed to be fun and functional that has started to show its age, unfortunately, and the one thing that you never thought would happen, will happen. Your workplace will transfasson from the idyllic, easy, social paradise you thought it welches for the first month (or week, or day) you worked there, and turn into its truest form a haven for colleagues and bosses who ask extremely awkwardquestions.This will happen. Nothing is pure. So how do you deal? There are a few options1.Be shockingly honest. This is the quickest way to make your colleague just as uncomfortable as you are. The next time you hear You dont look so good this week. Have you showered? go ahead and tell themall the gory details of your sinus infection, period cramps or stomach flu. Are you pregnan t? can be easily met with Oh, no, but I do wish I was, and weve been trying, and if you have time it would really help to talk to someone about it. The more honest you can be, the better. Go ahead, share how you got that weird rash. Questions about family? Money? Yep, if you let them have the dirty details, even just once, I promise theyll never ask again.2. Change the topic entirely. Dont I want to make American great again? You know, funny you asked, because I have been thinking about getting a standing desk, and I really cant decide if it would improve my core muscles all that much If you dont want to talk about it, dont.3. Throw it back atem. Sometimes honesty can be used to do more than just push people away. If you love your job 99 percent of the time and would like to continue happily working there, try giving yourself a couple deep breathsand then answer the question, honestly. Even if it makes you a little uncomfortable or causes you to blush at first, being radically forth coming can often build trust. It can be easy to become a little too private at work, operating in our own little zones. This can make us seem stuffy, unapproachable, and like were holding something back. Dont hold back You dont have to tell anyone your life story, but the next time the woman sitting next to you at lunch asks if youve been through a breakup lately, you can say Yes. You can even say Yes, and it was hard, but Im doing better now. And if you really want to build that workplace friendship? You can go ahead and ask her, Have you? (Thats probably what she really wants to talk about, anyway.)4. Raise those eyebrows to the sky. Sometimes the awkward questions asked by colleagues arent just quirky theyre shocking and potentially even offensive. As an out lesbian in the workplace, Im often asked invasive questions about my personal life and sex life, usually by people I hardly know. If you feel surprised and uncomfortable in a conversation, its entirely valid to express that d iscomfort. I like to react naturally Excuse me? I cant believe you asked me that or even Wow. Why would you ask that question? When paired with a look that mirrors the disbelief and disapproval Im feeling inside, this reaction can be the ultimate conversation-ender. No one ever wants to feel like theyve said the wrong thing. But sometimes, unfortunately, people do. And its okay to let them know that its made you feel awkward.If youve tried all of these options, and your cube mate still insists on asking about your salary, sex life or spiritual beliefs and makes for awkward moment after awkward moment, you might just have to give them the silent stare and frown. Or make a rulemore than once, Ive let coworkers know that I dont like to discuss money with people who arent close family. Remember Any conversation is half yours, so you get to help make the rules Dont be bullied into answering questions that youd rather not discuss. Of course, if you feel really uncomfortable, in that icky- no-good-gross way, tell your supervisor. No one should be forced to have an upsetting or disturbing conversation. Just awkward? That can be okay, especially if you have some textbook responses lined up. Next time, youll know how to deal.--Kaitlyn Duling is an author and poet who is passionate about supporting and uplifting other women. Her work can be found atwww.kaitlynduling.com.